frustration

You know how annoying spouses can be? Like whether we (I’m saying ‘we’ because Lord knows I’m guilty too) intend to or not, we can annoy the c to the rap out of our significant others. For instance, take that photo up there, Gregory is clearly annoying the bejeezus out of me. I mean look at my face for heaven sake… ANNOYED!

But seriously, as annoyed as I am in that photo, I would give my left arm to have Gregory here annoying me right now. It’s been three months since I’ve seen him, almost four months since Fifty has, and the Green Card process has hit another road block.

Back at the end of July, I sent off what technically should have been the last of the documents (the process is staggered, you don’t get to send off everything all at once, it’s bits at a time) and at the beginning of August, I received an email letting me know that the documents had been received. Unfortunately along with the email came a letter saying that it would be at least 60 business days before the documents would be reviewed. I cannot tell you how crushed we were to find out that it would be October before our case was looked at again.

Fast forward to last week…

On Saturday I received an email telling me that a file with instructions was on its way to us! I got so excited! I thought, “this is it, this it… the interview is happening soon!

Wrong.

Last Thursday afternoon the instructions arrived in my inbox; the instructions that said that I had to resubmit the forms that I had sent in August because there was a problem with two of the answers I had provided. The next morning I was ready at 6AM to phone the visa center to verify that I was filling out the answers correctly. Miraculously I spoke to a kind lady and after getting the forms sorted again, I had them at the post office by 9 o’clock.

And then yesterday, the road block… I received the receipt of documents email, but once again, the dreaded ’60 days’ letter came with it.

#$@&%*!

60 days! Another effing 60 days! Are you kidding me?! No one should have to get that letter twice.

So this means, that unless our file is magically pulled from the bottom of the pile where it has landed again, we’re spending 120 days essentially waiting on one set of forms to be reviewed.

 #$@&%*!

Consequently, that also means that Gregory will not be here for Thanksgiving, he will not be here for Christmas, we won’t ring in the New Year together, but if I’m lucky, he could make it here for my birthday in the beginning of February.

#$@&%*!

So yeah, this all sucks. We’re in a terrible place of limbo not knowing when our lives together can recommence, and then there’s Fifty, poor, poor Fifty. I don’t even want to know what he thinks about where his daddy has disappeared to, and Gregory is so distraught about missing his dog that he refuses to speak to him on the phone, instead saying things like, “it’s better if he thinks I’m dead.”

To be honest, none of us are handling this well at the moment. The first couple of months were one thing, but getting that second 60 day letter has broken our spirit and that’s why I’m asking you, my friends, to please send every bit of good juju and positive prayers and thoughts our way. Maybe if we try hard enough, we can make some bureaucratic magic happen. 

25 responses to “frustration”

  1. You poor thing!! Good to see there is a paperwork mess on both sides of the pond!! I'm thinking of you both and hang in there. I can't imagine how hard it is but stay strong and optimistic! XO

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  2. Sounds like little time with an immigration attorney and a few letters/emails to your Congressional representatives are in order. Hang in there.

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  3. It depends on which center is taking care of your case.. been there… Even though I was in the US, they lost my file for years and then when I found out and applied again for the greencard, it came by mail 2 months later without interview, nothing…Go figure!! I hope a miracle – a quick one -will happen soon. With those guys, you never know… Thinking about you!! Gros bisous

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  4. Poor baby. I am so sorry. Would it help to pay a lawyer who specializes in international law to write a letter for you? How about a letter to your congressman or senator. The VA owed my husband nearly $70,000. in back fees for services provided for over a year. Now, my husband is in private practice, so he cannot afford to wait so long. He wrote letters to our senator and congressman, and in a month (maybe less) the VA was calling and apologizing and quickly sent payments. Needless to say, he also told them he'd never see another VA patient. Squeaky wheel gets the grease.

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  5. I feel so very sorry for all of you. It is terrible to have your life on hold for such an indeterminate length of time. Are you prohibited except for the costs (I know that is always an issue for everyone) from going to see Gregory before this is all resolved. I send every good wish and hope for a quick resolution your way.

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  6. Sending you all the positive vibes. I hope a miracle happens for the two of you!

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  7. Oh, we feel your pain. Sending all good visa juju your way!

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  8. Sara, I'm reminded of a quip I've enjoyed quoting for many years:”Smile, things could get worse .. so I smiled, and sure as shit .. things got worse!”Hang in there, Girl .. Love has incredible power and you two will be fine. The harder the battle – The sweeter the Victory!Aloha,Bill Fackerwww.kauai-to-paris.com

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  9. That's heartbreaking and frustrating! I'm SO sorry! Saying a little prayer for you guys!!

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  10. Oh Sara, I know how you feel. I am so so fed up, all I want is to go home and see my family. It has been over a year and it could still be another year yet. Maybe more. The thought hurts my heart.

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  11. That's awful, I'm so sorry for you and poor fifty. Being away from your significant other is terribly hard. Sending good luck and wishes your way, hopefully the 60 days speed by and it's your birthday in no time.

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  12. Here in Aust we have Local Government Ministers that deal with problems/decisions within your suburb. When something is stalled or difficult we write/go to them. Do you have the same? I would write to everyone I could and keep going until they tire of you and bring your file to the front! Good luck. X

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  13. I'm with everyone else – I can't imagine what it would be like to be separated from Mortimer – ooops slip up! Andrew for so long 😦 I'm sitting here typing and I can't see the screen properly as tears are welling. Everything is crossed for a quick resolution.

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  14. Oh no! That sucks so much! I am so so sorry for you guys! And for poor Fifty! I can understand how heartbroken and annoyed you are. That stupid visa process can be so nerve-wracking! I hope a miracle will happen and they will work a little faster on it!

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  15. Doubling up with my best wishes on Facebook; I have done long distance, and you start to miss all the stuff that normally would drive you crazy. In fact, you wish you were being driven crazy at that very moment! Ugh ugh ugh.

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  16. I am sorry to hear that Gregory and yourself have to start this step in the immigration process all over again. Even more frustrating is that the clock starts all over again. I know from experience what really counts is filing in a district that isn't overworked or completely incompetent (I'm hoping you filed with one those, but it depends on your residency). Well, lets of well wishes and hugs so that things move along quick, so that you and Gregory may be reunited ! *Sarah Grace

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  17. Oh my god, this breaks my heart for y'all. Can you make a trip to France soon??

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  18. I'm sending you speedy positive vibes – stay strong, it will end, and do what you can to make things happen. xx

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  19. What a crappy system! So sorry for you both. Lots of good juju coming from Virginia.

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  20. Oh, Sara – I'm so sorry. You can have all my good juju! I know you need it. I can't believe how difficult it's been for you guys. Being married to an American is supposed to be the easier way to move to America, at least I thought. Maybe he should have just taken his chances sneaking in the border…

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  21. Sending you lots of good Juju. This is ridiculous! Why should it take 60 days for them to look at a couple of extra answers! Argh! Crazy.

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  22. Lots of juju heading your way. So, so, so sorry to hear that. I can't imagine what it must feel like. I so hope that miracle happens and the file is plumped form the bottom to the top! Gregory needs to make it to the States…and fast!! X

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  23. GOSH this is bullshit. I am so so sorry.

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  24. Sarah, late to this but horrified. How awful for you,mGregory,mand Fifty. And, having seen your latest post, it doesn't appear that our elected representatives are at all helpful, either. You three are in my prayers, for good news that will come soon!

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  25. “It's better if he thinks I'm dead…” spoken like a true Frenchman. Okay, sorry, this is no joking matter. GOOD GRIEF! What's the deal? I'm so sorry this is happening. Does it really “not count” that you guys were married in MA? Doesn't that count for something? Either way, keep your spirits up and keep hounding them. There has just got to be a way. Sending you only the best. xo.

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