Wednesday, October 13, 2010

all you can eat

The Husband loves to eat. He loves his food. And he loves crazy food like beef tongue, veal brains, and beef tartare. This means that anytime we go to Aix en Provence, I know that we're eating at the place that does the all you can eat beef carpaccio (but I'm pretty much OK with this because I've usually been bribed with a trip to Zara and a couple of English language magazines that I can pick up in the city. English language magazines make my heart go all a flutter).

I order a bottle of wine, something like steak and frites, and then sit back and watch the carnage happen...
..............................................................................................................

First the plate of raw meat comes and it looks like this...

{my name used to be Bessie}

At this point any conversation will cease and The Husband begins to devour a cow...

 
{me like food}

...making sure to clean his plate 
(he's a good boy, he always cleans his plate).

This is then repeated six times. 
(Five is he's not feeling his best, maybe seven if he's feeling good.) 

And out of boredom (because how long can you really sit in a restaurant watching your husband eat a whole cow) I drink loads of this...

{drink me}

(but like I need an excuse)
Check it out, it's Italian. 
(Confession time... I prefer Italian wine to French wine. Don't tell Le Villagers.) 

And admire the Missoni labeled bottle of Pelligrino... 


...mentally comparing it to Perrier's Dita Von Teese bottle and decide that even though I adore Miss Von Teese (and so much more since she divorced Manson; he's gross) I prefer the Pelligrino bottle anyway . And oh how I really really want a Missoni bikini and to stay at the Missoni hotel in Edinburgh (I really like Missoni). 

And when I begin to get extra fidgety, I'll attempt to draw a map of the U.S. with a pomme frite dipped in candle wax...
(french fries and wax is a very artistic medium... pure genius)


And consider changing my name to Basquiat. 

I am quite the artist...

...non?

bisou

 



P.S. check out the Dita Von Teese for Perrier mini movie here
It takes a bit to load, but if you like Dita, it's worth it. 

31 comments:

  1. Ha! I have a neighbor that achieved making the serveurs at "the place" very mad when he ordered his 11th plate of carpaccio...they wouldn't let him have 12.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sweet lord! 11??!! That's crazy! I wouldn't want to be in the car with him afterwards... stinky!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dear Sara,
    I also love beef tartare! Last month in Provence I eat a lot of beef tartare. Tell to your husband that where I live, there's a little restaurant that made the most incredible beef tartare I ever eat in my life! So delicious!
    I also love italian wine, how I can't living in Italy? Tell me what you prefer, red or white and I send you from here, really!
    Bisou, Babi

    ReplyDelete
  4. awwww those beef look really great!!!! ^^ I also love beef <3 You make me hungry now lol

    ReplyDelete
  5. Crikey, six/seven plates of beef carpaccio?! I'd be full after one, if even that! But I totally understand why you agree to go. I'm obsessed with zara at the moment!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Show me the beef! .... and you did. Wow, I cannot believe that he can eat that much. Steak tartare is great but there is no way I could handle more than one or two. He is some kind of champion!

    Love your stories!

    ReplyDelete
  7. You are too funny! Zara would help me sit through that too! xo

    ReplyDelete
  8. i want to try one! loving your blog ;)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Can you please send me a recipe for brains? i'm serious.
    i could spend an afternoon doing just about anything to get my hands on english mags.
    glad you feel better. maybe you need more meat.
    x
    a

    ReplyDelete
  10. Wilzie does the same at all-you-can-eat-bbq-beef-ribs night.
    Its carnage!

    ReplyDelete
  11. French fries and candle wax is the newest craze, you're right! LOL, I could totally eat a whole cow, I adore meat, Mr. Deer teases me all the time! XX!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Sara Louise, I would be drinking the wine myself as well!!

    I have a Luxurious New Giveaway on my site! Come & Enter

    Xoxo
    Karena
    Art by Karena

    ReplyDelete
  13. That was one of my problems with Europeans, they eat the craziest things. And since I am vegan, I am pretty much disgusted by it all, even though I know its culture and been happening forever now, but still! Poor cow! :(
    But I guess its better to utilize all parts of the cow...

    ReplyDelete
  14. Boy, I'm glad it's you and not me sitting there! There's no way I can watch him eat that without being sick. Ewww.

    ReplyDelete
  15. I will never understand the eating of raw meat. It just does not make sense to my fried brain.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Ok from one girl to another, I'm gonna get really "real" on you here. I can tell you're a pretty darn smart gal. Are u sure you're getting the mental stimulation (while in France) that you obviously require?!! (beyond trying to master the tricky language.)
    I'm sure sitting and watching the hubs consume mass quantities of raw meat is fun and while I too admire a good working partnership between Missoni and San Pellegrino...as well as the work of Basquiat...(even if the medium is fries/wax,) I think you need to pour your creative brilliance into something really satisfying. This blog is a start. Are you working right now?
    It's time to start writing a book. There I said it. (Am I being too bold? Is this honesty grounds for friends-off?)

    ReplyDelete
  17. I love all i can eat, hence last post

    xxx

    ReplyDelete
  18. bleh. I hate raw stuff, including the raw salmon my in-laws like to eat for holidays. Next time you come to Aix we should meet up.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Sara Louise you little imp! You should warn old men not to visit it Ms Von Teese. You know I do enjoy her sense of style when she's dressed, ironic ain't it?

    ReplyDelete
  20. Ha ha!! What a funny post! While I have no issues with what your hubby eats I will say the amount makes my tummy churn a bit. That's a lotta food! But at least you get a lotta wine, so that must be a nice consolation prize.

    Oh and get a frame for that artwork. You never know who might like that sorta thing. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  21. Good god that meat is just too....RAW. I thought with French food you got lots of thick wine sauces. I could eat just about anything with thick wine sauce on it. And a bottle of wine to wash it down with. Mmmmmm.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Babi -The Husband would love to try the Italian tartare I'm sure! And I love red, you're such a sweetheart x

    Kade - you should hang out with The Husband :-)

    Cafe Bellini - Zara is a very good bribing tool! :-)

    Genie - The Hubsband and his friend, Gatz, usually see who can eat more, that night, The Husband won :-)

    ReplyDelete
  23. Debby - Ah, for the love of Zara... xo

    mr.pineapple man - thank you. And I'm loving your name :-)

    Aidan - we've already had the brains discussion. But the shortorder cook image is pretty damn funny! x

    Fojoy - I think I would participate in all you could eat bbq ribs! That would be awesome. I'd have to where a big bib though and have an industrial sized box of wetwipes.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Shari - thank you for recognizing my genius :-)

    Karena - thanks for the heads up on the giveaway,it's brill, I've entered :-)

    Sophia - there are some pretty crazy things being served up here! :-)

    ADOC - that's what the wine for; distraction xo

    Redhead - I don't get it either, but he freaking loves it! :-)

    Nikosmommy - I like honesty, and it's definitely not grounds for a friend off! You're too fab! I've got a few things up my sleeve... xo

    Jersey - can't wait to see what you decide on x

    Megan - meeting up for a drink in Aix would be fun :-)

    James - I am a little imp! hee hee xo

    Habebi - I totally should have framed it! Alas, it went into the bin :-( x

    DFG - there's a lot of food here I wish I could just cover with a thick wine sauce. Maybe I'll just try pouring my wine on my plate? xo

    ReplyDelete
  25. I drooled looking at Bessie (I mean the carpaccio) - as soon as I got off the plane here I knew I wanted it - and finally had to stop myself from eating a 4th plate in the first 4 days. Not sure what this is about - I don't eat like this in the US. We won't count the bottles of vini italiani I've put away the last month. My friend insists I visit Aix-in-Provence next month...I may have to visit "The Place" ...

    ReplyDelete
  26. I wanted to say something very funny but it has left my brain. Sorry. Must have been all the insecticides in my attempt to kill moths and moth eggs and moth larvae. Yuck.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Love the little map, haha! The raw meat though? This vegetarian just doesn't get it, ugh! haha

    ReplyDelete
  28. this was hilarious!

    i like carpaccio but even this plate was too much for me!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Consider yourself a lucky gal because The Husband might have liked snake, worm and grasshopper.

    ReplyDelete
  30. At what point do the meat sweats kick in? I loves me some raw cow and even used to eat tiny rolled up balls of ground beef, (with salt of course) when I was little but man...could not take down that much flesh in one sitting. Must be a dude thing...

    ReplyDelete
  31. you are hilarious!

    & your life is incredible! I dream of going to provence!

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...
Pin It button on image hover